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lyrics

TEMPLE CHANGES
by Weird Alma (Parody of "Changes" by David Bowie)

This whole past year I had been waiting for
My time to go into the temple
after joining the Mormon church, and
I'd heard there were some crazy things
But my time there was not so bad
No old guys touching me naked
No women covering their faces with veils
I've returned and I'll report that
It's only mildly cultish now

T-t-temple changes
Time to phase out the strange
Temple changes
Now even less like the Masonic one
T-t-temple changes
Time to phase out the strange
Temple changes
No more black skin for the Demonic one
God may change things
For He's the same all the time

Uhhhh. Hmmmm.

I watched a pleasant little PowerPoint show
and heard nothing of slitting throats
or disembowelment
Those things are still there in symbolic ways
but does it matter if you don't know that?
And these women they don't covenant
to obey their husbands any more
I guess misogyny was only meant
For the generations who came before

T-t-temple changes
Time to phase out the strange
Temple changes
No more vengeance for the Prophet Joe
T-t-temple changes
Time to phase out the strange
Temple changes
No "pay lay ale" or evil priests and popes
God may change things
For He's the same all the time

New revelations are coming through
It has nothing to do with the polls from focus groups

T-t-temple changes
Time to phase out the strange
Temple changes
No more fourth wall breaking Lucifer
T-t-temple changes
Time to phase out the strange
Temple changes
20 minutes shorter than it was before
God may change things
For He's the same all the time
But really, "nothing ever changed at all"
Is what they'll say in some time


"He set the temple ordinances to be the same forever and ever and set Adam to watch over them, to reveal them from heaven to man, or to send angels to reveal them”

(Joseph Smith, History of the Church, vol.4, p. 208)

credits

from Straight Outta Titles With Straight Outta in the Title (2019), released April 9, 2018
Weird Alma: knuckles on throat (2nd chair)

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all rights reserved

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Weird Alma Walla Walla, Washington

What do you get when you combine an ExMormon with a singer/songwriter/humorist/parodist? An ExMormon singer-songwriter humorist parodist. Duh.

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